I'm feeling rather bl(ah)(og)...

I know I should be over the moon that I have the opportunity to study full time but all I can think about is all the things I need to do and accomplish and where I am deficient.It can't help that I feel like I have to cram as much learning as I can into my time in Israel since I'm older... it's as if for every year over 18 or 22 I am, I have to work that much harder, go to that many more classes, answer that many more questions.Now, in addition to that, I have the practical concerns for certainly I could not forget I have bills to pay, student loans to make good on and hopefully a job when I go home.But how do you suck every drop of learning out of an experience when a third of your brain is devoted to your work tasks that have to get done that day and your mind is dreaming of that delicious garden tub and clean bathroom you left in the States?It's a balance I am constantly striving for while I spend time in Israel learning. I envy those men and women who dedicate their lives to learning Torah or stay in academia all their lives. I watch the women around me with their varying degrees of commitment to classroom learning and I know that while we are all here for the same reason (mostly), many of them would benefit from a program with more experiential classes. Not all of us are built to sit in a chair and learn for hours upon hours a day. I think about myself and my commitment to learn everything these amazing teachers are willing to give over. My face is almost always in the classroom, not only do I try not to miss classes, I dislike missing classes but how do I balance that with my need, my primal need to use my hands for more than note-taking, page flipping, and computer typing? What about the knowledge that I want to sweat and be sore, use my muscles until they ache?And just as I had these questions, a solution walked into my lap. Go on an archeological dig. I have the opportunity to go up north to the Galilee and dig a 1st Century synagogue. 1st Century people! Let me explain what this means for the normal humans who are not as obsessed with history or archeology as I am...Our Second Holy Temple was destroyed in 70 CE. Prior to the destruction, it was not common that Jews had synagogues. There was only the one Temple in Jerusalem. It was only after this time that Jews rallied around making a local structure with rabbis (this took a lot of time). Therefore, this synagogue was either from the 30 years after the Second Temple was destroyed or one of the rare synagogues built DURING the Second Temple period and to make it even more rare, there have only been 7 found in the world.Here's some info about it from the Israeli Antiquities Authority:

"A synagogue from the Second Temple period (50 BCE-100 CE) was exposed in archaeological excavations the Israel Antiquities Authority is conducting at a site slated for the construction of a hotel on Migdal beach, in an area owned by the Ark New Gate Company. In the middle of the synagogue is a stone that is engraved with a seven-branched menorah (candelabrum), the likes of which have never been seen. The excavations were directed by archaeologists Dina Avshalom-Gorni and Arfan Najar of the Israel Antiquities Authority.The main hall of synagogue is c. 120 square meters in area and its stone benches, which served as seats for the worshippers, were built up against the walls of the hall. Its floor was made of mosaic and its walls were treated with colored plaster (frescos). A square stone, the top and four sides of which are adorned with reliefs, was discovered in the hall. The stone is engraved with a seven-branched menorah set atop a pedestal with a triangular base, which is flanked on either side by an amphora (jars).According to the excavation director, Dina Avshalom-Gorni of the Israel Antiquities Authority, “We are dealing with an exciting and unique find. This is the first time that a menorah decoration has been discovered from the days when the Second Temple was still standing. This is the first menorah to be discovered in a Jewish context and that dates to the Second Temple period/beginning of the Early Roman period. We can assume that the engraving that appears on the stone, which the Israel Antiquities Authority uncovered, was done by an artist who saw the seven-branched menorah with his own eyes in the Temple in Jerusalem. The synagogue that was uncovered joins just six other synagogues in the world that are known to date to the Second Temple period”.

What an amazing opportunity to use my other skills in life and come back to school with a zest for sitting in class. I imagine after a week of hunching over in the sun and dirt, I will enjoy a clean classroom with comfy chairs.

Just Keep Swimming

This past week, the Torah portion that we read we Chayei Sarah. In Hebrew this means "The Life of Sarah." The odd thing about this parsha (portion) is that in the first line we read about the death of Sarah. How is this about her life if in the very first line, she dies?Well, everyone has their theories... so let me tell you mine. In Berakhot 18ab our sages tell us "The wicked are called dead even in their lifetime, but the righteous, even after death are called living." Throughout the parsha we learn about how Sarah is living through her son Isaac and his eventual wife Rivka (Rebecca).I think that this is the life of Sarah because as Jewish mothers (or G-d willing, eventual mothers) our legacy lives on within our children. Our actions have lasting effects on ourselves, on our children, on the world. If we choose to involve children in kashrut, we have a better chance of our children keeping kosher. If we light candles with our kids, it will become important to them too. On Passover we tell the four children, "this is because what G-d did for me when I was at Mt. Sinai." We don't say, "you have to do this because you are Jewish." The key to our lasting legacy is our children must see us living our Judaism. Teaching children to give tzadaka (charity) won't stick with them if they don't see us give tzadaka ourselves.I Jew. How do you Jew? Would you like to Jew together?I don't know. That's the decision we all must make in our own time and for ourselves. But we are the legacies of our mothers and will be passing our legacy on to our children and that must figure into our decisions because the things we choose today are not just for ourselves but for our legacy as well.Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Why is this the one physics lesson I remember?  I don't know. I do know that this is true in our lives. We stand in the world with equal but opposite forces pushing in on us. We were given the opportunity to choose which flow to fall into. Close your eyes and imagine standing at the cross-waters of two powerful rivers. You are equally being pushed south and west. Which force is stronger? Neither. So which way do you go? What river is your flow?The beauty I find in Judaism is within the flow. Not every person is up to every mitzvah, no matter how much we wish we were. However, if we can find the flow to our Judaism, we can create a successful and positive legacy. No matter if that means sheitel (wig) or tichel (scarf) or nothing, black hat or bareheaded. Seek out your flow, fall into the river and, as my favorite fish once told me... just keep swimming.

Hashkafic Awareness 101

Your  השקפה - hashkafa is your level of observance/philosophy towards your Jewish practice.This has been seriously highlighted (highlit?) in my life lately. Really ever since I came to Jerusalem. Being on a path to increased observance for almost 12 years, there have been subtle changes to my hashkafa and some less subtle ones.Subtle - realizing all the sudden one day that I am not as comfortable as I have been in the past singing or dancing in front of men.Not subtle - dressing modestly, even in the heat of summer.Subtle - phasing out non-Kosher restaurants (starting by only eating dairy out then being vegetarian).Not subtle - turning off your cell phone for shabbis.You get the picture. But as I spend time in Israel, my practice and observance of Judaism has grown in leaps and bounds. I don't remember the last time I ate in a restaurant that served both milk and meat (here it is a part of the decision process... do you want to be fleshig [eat meat] or be chalavi [eat dairy]). I haven't driven a car, flipped on a light switch, or strained food during the 25 hours of shabbis in 8 weeks. Wow. But now I am in a place where I have to make decisions for the future. In my future home, with my future husband (G-d willing), how will we practice our Judaism?In my home growing up, we followed a lot of the spirit of the halacha (laws) but not always to the letter as defined by a certain rabbi or two. We enjoyed our shabbis and didn't spend money but we watched tv and turned on lights. Our definition of halacha was fluid and evolving. And I loved that but I also like some of the rules... however, some of the minutia is hard for me. You can't tear toilet paper, you can't file a nail, you have to pour the hot water in a cup then into a second cup and then put your Starbucks Via instant coffee in. Perhaps the minutia is hard for me because I didn't grow up with it so in an attempt to understand it better, I am going to have a chevrusa (study group) with one of my teachers/friends/most awesomest chick ever to learn more about these things so I can decide if I can put them into practice.You know what is most interesting to me? Certain things just make sense to me, even if they seem illogical to others. Like covering my hair when I get married. I am thrilled and excited to do it. It seems like a special bond between husband and wife. But I can't not file my nails on shabbis?Sometimes our hashkafa comes out of life experiences or bad experiences with others. My path towards tznius (modest) dressing began with a crappy relationship that left me feeling naked in the world. I realized I didn't want everyone to be privy to me and tznius & shomer negiah (not touching people of the opposite sex) was a way to protect that. Especially when your practice is born out of these types of situations, you have to ensure you are doing it for the right reasons and that they are sustainable, most certainly if you are making decisions about getting married.One of the things that irks me the most is when people assume that there is an end point to hashkafa... I think it is ever evolving. Translations change and so do we. What is relevant for you right now may not make sense in 15 years when your life situation has changed. Nothing is forever and nothing is for certain.That's why we should all just Jew in the now. Express our Judaism by making the word Jew a verb. Judaism is not just a label, it's an action. A hashkafa.

I write like...

There is this great site called "I Write Like" which analyzes a writing sample and tells you who you write like.Here's a few samples of how I write:For my Cats In Israel & Traveling Talia for Tishrei pt 2 blog -

I write likeKurt Vonnegut

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

For my Zivug vs Beshert blog & A Journey to Matter... A Hike to Be blog -

I write likeJames Joyce

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

For my Inferior vs Superior Health Care Systems blog -

I write likeMario Puzo

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

And finally for my Is this the future Israeli Jewish women are doomed to live? blog -

 
I write likeDan Brown

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Pretty interesting! Try out your writing here: I Write Like

Cats in Israel

I literally just watched a woman...a HUMAN BEING... cross the street to get out of a CAT'S path!! What?! Since when do human beings have to get out of the way for cats?Since I live in Israel, actually. The cats have their own underworld here. I sincerely believe there is a cat mafia and they have cat stores and little corrupt cat government officials. They run the place!No but seriously, what's with the cats in Israel? Well here's the short story.Back when Israel was under the British Mandate, prior to 1948, the Brits brought cats to Israel to help with the rat population. As far as I can tell, it worked. I haven't seen a rat or a mouse since I got here... however, the cats have become a nuisance. One vet likens cats in Israel to squirrels in the US... yeah, it's that bad here. They sit and wait in garbage cans and gather around restaurants. The garbage is outside by the street and so it is easy for them to access. However, many cats are sick and injured, it isn't pretty. The worst is when they get in the building. There aren't too many bugs here and not many people have screens so cats just waltz in. I caught a cat in our kitchen a few weeks back. Our kitchen is on the third floor and I noticed the trash was knocked over. I turned on the light and picked up the trash can and this big black cat went flying past me and down the stairs. Ewww... And the cat fights... it's like a movie with all the screeching and squalling.So yes, in Israel, the humans will cross the street to avoid a crazy cat... much better than meeting one in a dark alley at night! There are some movements in Israel to spay and neuter the cats then release them back into the wild in hopes that it will reduce the number of feral cats in Israel but who knows if it is working. The latest estimate I saw placed the number of feral cats in Israel at ... are you ready for this? 30 - 40 million! And most of them aren't cuddly and cute... Not to mention that I have seen a fair share of dead, dying, or decomposing cats... not pretty.And as I type this I can heard a cat whining... oh man!

 

 

Urban Exploration at Lifta

Rucheli and I had an AMAZING trip to Lifta this week. It is an abandoned old neighborhood that was last inhabited in 1948. There are about 50 stone building still 'standing' (and I used that word loosely). There are some squatters who live there but mainly it is like a nature preserve.Rucheli wrote an amazing blog about it so until I can get to it, I shall point you there - Rucheli's WritingsAnd if you want to check out the awesome pics, head over to our Flickr pages! Talia's PicsRucheli's Pics - Originals & EditedLook for more Urban Exploring in the future, Rucheli and I had a blast. And note... it is very important to have two photographers there! Why? 1. to take pics of each other and 2. to help each other climb!Some favorite pics:

Stunning pictures

Recently, my friend posted a link to some amazing pictures that were enhanced using HDR techniques. It has gotten me interested in playing with some of my photos using this technology. I haven't tried yet but here are a few from the site. The Denver image isn't the coolest on the website but it's cool that Denver got included. And here is another fav... MonacoYou can find more here - Copy and Paste BlogMaybe I will do one of Jerusalem...

Zivug vs Beshert

In one of my classes last week we were talking about marriage and the concept of Beshert or Zivug. Beshert means soul-mate and zivug, as best as I can find means pair or partner.We were not able to get a clear or seemingly correct answer to the question of the difference of these two. All of the people that I have asked have indicated that in current times, they are exchangeable, meaning the same thing. Some sources online postulated that a beshert is just a match but your zivug is the perfect person you are supposed to be with. However, other sources online stated just the opposite, that your beshert is your perfect mate and zivug is the pair.I found this nice explination of the concept by Rabbi Baruch HaLevi -

Beshert = pre-destined, soulmate (Zivug Rishon in Talmudic and Kabbalistic Literature) Forty days before the formation of an embryo, a Heavenly voice proclaims: The daughter of this one is destined to marry this one. Sanhedrin 22a When Hashem first created man, He created Adam and Chavah together as one, and then He separated them. The RASHBA (TESHUVOS HA'RASHBA 1:60) explains that Hashem first created man and woman together and then separated them, so that they would later be able to come together and be joined and feel like a single unit. Perhaps it is for this reason that before the man is born a Bas Kol (Divine Voice) announces who his Zivug (partner) will be -- this shows that they both come from the same spiritual root, and that the woman that he eventually marries will be part of his own Neshamah (soul). It would be impossible to bond their souls together in such a way after they are created, and therefore Hashem bonds them together before they are created in order for them to be able to bond together strongly. (If one of them is a Tzadik and the other is a Rasha, then one can influence the other to improve since they are bonded together so strongly.) --Talmud, Sota 2 (adapted from  Kollel Iyun Hadaf of Har Nof)

From this text it appears that your beshert is commonly accepted as your ultimate match while there are some Kabbalistic levels of zivug.To add another dimension here, I found this really great etymological breakdown of the word zivug. It is by Rabbi Julian Sinclair on the Jewish Chronical online.

A zivug is a life partner. In modern Hebrew today ben or bat zug is the politically correct term for ones significant other, equivalent to partner in English.The word has some surprising connections to contemporary English via a common Greek root. Zivug comes from the Greek zogen, meaning to join and zeugen, a pair. This comes from the same source as zygote, which, means a complex cell generated by the sexual reproduction of two gametes. According to the invaluable Jewish-words blog balashon, these derive from the Indo-European root yeug, meaning to join, from which we have the words conjugal, jugular, yoke and even yoga, which means union.The etymology tells us that a zivug is not just a life partner. It also has the sense of being the right life partner. The rabbis were under no illusions about how difficult the search for a zivug can be can be. The Talmud (Sotah 2a) writes that it is as hard (for God) to make zivugim as to split the Red Sea. Another source says that since creating the world, matching zivugim has been Gods principal occupation. On the one hand, the rabbis did express the sense of miraculousness about finding ones predestined other half. (Forty days before birth, a heavenly voice goes out and says, This persons son is for that persons daughter.) Yet they are aware, too, of the complexities of the quest for a mate; of first marriages and second marriages and missed opportunities, and how, nevertheless, one may find the right one, through whatever unfathomable means.

Fascinating!The topic has been top of mind for me lately as I continue down my spiritual and ritually observant growth path. In secular society, I worried so much. "Have I missed my beshert?" "Did I not notice him?" "Did I lose out on him because I am in חוץ לארץ (chutz laaretz)*?" It is hard to date in secular society and even harder to date Jewish. Especially if you don't live in NYC. How do you meet people? How do you meet people who practice Judaism the same way you do? That is why I really like the שדכן (shadchan)** style of dating. People who know you setting you up with a person that THEY know to be a good person with similar traits. Now, not so good שדכנם (shadchanim) will set you up with someone because you are both over the age of 30 or something ridiculous. And yes, that has happened to me. But a truly good one will get to know you, listen to you, and match you based on your character traits that are compatible. There isn't really dating to date here. (And by here I mean with in the religiously observant world.) There is dating to marry. No one of this, stay in a bad relationship for 5 years but he won't propose. Meet, go on dates, decide if you get along and want to go on more, decide if you could marry this person after many dates, get married. OR meet, go on dates, decide that the chemistry isn't there, say thanks but no thanks. There are, of course, some downsides but all in all, I sincerely prefer it to secular dating.Novel idea, eh?Glossary -*חוץ לארץ - chutz laaretz = The diaspora**שדכן - shadchan = matchmaker (without all the negative connotations and Fiddler on the Roof references that you are thinking of RIGHT NOW)

Weekly Torah Reading

For those of you who don't know, I write a weekly Torah portion summary for the fabulous and famous, Patheos.This week's portion is Noach (or as he is commonly known, Noah). I hope you get a moment to read my short parsha summary here - Parsha Noach. I promise you, it's easy to read, you will be a hit at the shabbis table tonight with your new knowledge, and there is a really cool video at the end!You can always find my parshot at the Jewish Portal of Patheos along with tons of other really interesting articles. And if you are interested in finding any other parsha, check out my Tiptoeing Through The Torah page.