A Whirlwind Tishrei

Last Tishrei I wrote about my adventures, traveling and getting settled in Israel. It was an incredible time for me. I was embarking on an extraordinary journey into myself and my Judaism.This Tishrei has been markedly different. I am back in the states, working hard for the Jewish community and have a lot going on. But I forced myself to stop and reflect this year as Rosh Hashanah approached and then Yom Kippur. We moved into Sukkot feeling fresh and ready to handle the new year... and then I was truly caught by surprise. I saw grumblings on Twitter that Gilad Shalit, the boy who was kidnapped in a cross border raid by Hamas FIVE YEARS AGO, was going home.Insert Jaw Drop Here.I just couldn't believe it. I walked past the tent where his parents sat, outside the Prime Minister's house in Jerusalem, so many times.We tied yellow ribbons on our backpacks. We wore Free Gilad t-shirts. We tweeted the days, hours, minutes he had been held as a kidnapped prisoner. We begged Hamas to allow the Red Cross to see him, as it states in international law that any enemy combatant is allowed visits from the Red Cross... it is required for prisoners of war... but no. Only two videos from him in five years. He was allowed to write two letters home in that time. We came to this point many times... will Gilad be released this time?! Is he even still alive? I doubted it. It was just more human capital for Hamas to spend.Then it was announced Israel would be releasing 1,027 Palestinians to retrieve one man. Now these aren't petty thieves. They are murders. Murders that have been tried for their parts in bombing of CIVILIAN locations in Israel. Who were found with bombs strapped to their bodies, off to kill civilians in Israel and (Thank G-d) their bombs malfunctioned. Of the 1,027, 300 prisoners serving life sentences for involvement in deadly attacks on Israelis such as suicide bombings in buses and bars. These were people who were tried and convicted. And yet, they were treated better than Gilad. They were given three meals a day that were nutritionally significant. They were allowed exercise and to interact with other people. Many of them left the prison with higher degrees, earned in jail.What about Gilad? We treated the prisoners with due process and rights. How was our son treated? He was severely malnourished, sun deprived, and kept in solitary confinement for FIVE YEARS. They came home tanned and healthy, as if they had been on a holiday. Gilad fainted on the helicopter and walked with assistance.They try to murder us every day. In fact, one woman who was released told a group of children... CHILDREN!!! "I hope you will walk the same path we took and God willing, we will see some of you as martyrs." Meaning, I hope you blow yourselves up and DIE so you can kill Jews and Israelis.And yet we would give all these people up to have one boy back. I feel like that speaks to character on both sides very clearly. One side celebrates children blowing themselves up along with innocent civilians and the other values one life so highly, that they put the country in danger by releasing 1,000 murders.Now I need to clarify one thing. I am not saying that all Palestinians are evil or want children to blow themselves up. My family has very dear friends in East Jerusalem who used to call themselves Arab Israelis but now call themselves Palestinians. They are amazing people and I cannot imagine one of them intentionally causing harm to the Israelis.I am also not saying all Israelis are innocent. I have heard the rhetoric and it disgusts me. The skirmishes in the settlements gets us no where. However, that is not our majority and while some fanatics take lives, it is not on the scale of the Palestinians nor is it a part of the education system in the broader country. I once saw a Palestinian school book where the math section said, "I there are 10 Israelis and I kill seven, how many Israelis are there left to kill?" That is not healthy for anyone.I am disturbed by this deal almost as much as I am overjoyed to have Gilad Shalit home. But I can't muster any hope that this eternal war will find a resolution that does not cost many, many lives. Anyone who has been to Israel has seen the undertones... the bubbling anger on both sides. I just pray to G-d that is does resolve and that neither side loses too many sons and daughters in the process.

A Hero In My Eyes

If wearing eyeglasses was a club, I would be getting my 30 year pin in a couple of years along with a tacky gold wristwatch...I might have run for president. There might have been a messy power struggle and a splinter group who later rejoined because they knew I was the best thing for the eyeglasses crew since the invention of nose pads.Okay... that fantasy is all well and good but let's get to the point. I wear glasses. I've worn them since I was three years old. That first pair had little loop arms to go around my tiny ears and a bugs bunny on the side. I was waaaay cool. Actually, what was cool was being able to see. My parents thought I was 'special' when I was little because I always knocked things off the table. Water glasses, wine glasses, sauce, pretty much anything in arms reach for me was destined for the floor. They never really 'got it' but it wasn't until I was screened in pre-school at the JCC that they found out I was knocking things over because I couldn't see and had NO depth perception! My mom told me recently that when I got my glasses for the first time she heard me gasping in the backseat during the drive home. She asked what was wrong and I asked her if she knew there were trees outside. Yup, that is how nearsighted I was. Couldn't see the trees in the yard.Over the years I became a connoisseur of glasses... well... when I got older... until high school I had some interesting choices... tortoise-shell with pink tint... oh yeah...In fact, here is a gallery of some of my glasses over the years:

I hope you enjoyed that... eep... but we are here to talk about my hero. You see the newest frames? Very cute, yes? I love them. I got them back in May actually. Why haven't you seen them? Well, gee... if you live in Colorado and we talk regularly it could be because I have just begun wearing them! Yes I know it is October. But in the entire history of me wearing glasses, this is the first time I can recall having so many issues. Maybe it's just my old eyes but I had to go back and get the prescription redone because my eyes just couldn't take it. Then I just couldn't get the frames to fit my face right. They just hurt all the time. Well... I wasn't very smart about it. You see, I picked a doctor on my insurance (yes I have insurance now and it is SO exciting!) who was near my apartment... not near work... but I live downtown. And the shops downtown close at the end of the business day... meaning I haven't been able to get back into my glasses place to get them fixed! Totally my own fault... super lame and a bummer... I've just been working on average of 60 hours a week lately. Long and busy days don't lend for running out to get my glasses fixed. So on a recent and rare day when I was home during business hours I went it.Shane (that is the fabulous Shane Wheeler for those of you playing the home game) sat me down and we talked about the issues. He measured my face, fixed the glasses and brought them back. With a flick of his magically fingers he fixed the glasses! He made a few adjustments and all the sudden I could SEE!!! I could see and they didn't hurt!!! It was a magical day and Shane, well Shane earned the title of glasses hero. He truly saved the day. The people at Vision Care Specialistsin Denver have been incredible. Spending time with me to get the right pair, the right prescription, and the right fit. We talked about prescription sunglasses and decided we would try to find a pair. Well, goodness gracious, my glasses hero comes through AGAIN! He finds me a pair that look amazing on my face and fit within my insurance budget. I walked out of there feeling amazing. He solved my glasses issues and found me affordable sunglasses with a flick of his optician magic wand! It was amazing. I went back to pick up the sunglasses the other day and his fabulous compatriot, Julie (who is the trendy and fabulous fairy of hot glasses), made some minor tweaks to my glasses and fitted my sunglasses on me! What a joy!!!But truly, I have been without insurance for 12 years. This is not so great being a girl who wears glasses. I have paid way too much for my glasses and gone to all manner of optometrists but I have received the most amazing and kind service with Vision Care Specialists.Thanks to Shane and Julie for fixing me up!

Shana Tova u'Mitukah - A Happy and Sweet New Year

Shana tova to my readers! I have so many great blog posts waiting in the queue to finish and I promise I will but thank you for another amazing year with you, my loyal and kinda friends who continue to check this crazy blog!This time last year I was at Mayanot in Israel and exploring the holidays in Jerusalem. I remember the struggle I felt as I was trying to settle into life in Israel and celebrate the holidays away from my family. This year, life is totally different. Oh how I have grown and changed. Funny though... I am wearing the dress I bought one year ago to wear on Rosh Hashanah in Israel. A new girl in the old girl's dress.So Shana Tova u'Mitukah from me here is Denver with my family to you wherever you are and however you celebrate.If you want a throw back, check out these blogs: We Have To Walk Where? and Yom Kippur in Israel 

HackerPocalypse 2011 - The Lesson

If you would like to start this journey with me by reading part one, HackerPocalypse 2011 - The Story, please feel free.So yesterday, I told you the emotional parts, the sadness and sorrow of the losing 10+ years of email and memories. Today I am going to talk technical. If this has happened to you, here are the things you need to know.First of all, though I am a very savvy web person, I think I was the victim of a spam email. It looked like it was coming from Google. It was identical to their emails. It was about security. They didn't ask for my username and password, just told me about some security features. I checked the reply to address and it looked right. I clicked on the link in the email and it took me to (what looked exactly like) a Google page. It asked me to login to my email and then said I had updated my security settings.Looked totally legit but I think that is the only possible way they got my login information.I jumped out of bed when I was made aware about the situation (more on that here) and took action immediately. When I couldn't login to my account, I contacted Google and reported it. This caused the hackers to not be able to log back in. It is important to read ALL the steps first and try to follow them in order because you may give the hackers a chance to hack again if you don't. Many of these steps may only be Gmail centric since I am not familiar with other programs.

1. Contact Gmail or your email provider. Get passwords reset and changed. Make it clear that you do not have access and believe you were hacked. The hackers set up my fail safes (security question, default phone number to text password to, and secondary email account) to their information.
2. Once you gain access, in Gmail there is a little button on the very bottom right of the page. It says this:
   Last account activity: 10 minutes agoDetails
1. The "Details" is the button. Press that and a record of where you are logging in comes up. Chances are, they are using something to cloak their location. Don't try to catch them here. Just press: This account does not seem to be open in any other location. However, there may be sessions that have not been signed out. Log out from all other sessions. This will force the hackers out if they are still in your account.
3. The next step is to go to the mail settings. Press the button for Forwarding and POP/IMAP. Most likely they created a new reply to address. It should look a lot like your real address but be on ymail, hotmail, etc. I think they choose ymail since if you are reading fast, it looks like gmail.
1. IMMEDIATELY disable the forwarding. They set it to forward all incoming mail and delete them from your inbox. Save changes at the bottom.
4. Now that you have kicked them out of your email, let's do some damage control. Look in the trash folder for all your email that was dumped. I am pretty sure they have written a program to dump all into the trash.
5. Find the emails they sent to your contacts. They "bcc'd" everyone but you can still see the names. DO NOT USE YOUR CONTACT BOOK YET. Copy and paste those names into an email and let everyone know you are not in Madrid or London, you have not been held up at gun point, and it's your call if you want to tell them to send you money or not... ;)
6. Once you have sent those, it's time to recover email. In the trash, press the check box at the top of the navigation, you know, so it selects all. Once all 100 emails in the trash are selected, a little piece becomes highlighted under the navigation. It says, All 100 conversations on this page are selected. Select all xxx conversations in Trash. The second part of this is a link. If you click it, you will select all emails in the trash. I highly suggest just doing that to save your emails. I could not save mine, please save yours!
7. Click the Move To button and move them all to your inbox. If you have utilized filters/folders, you can easily archive those back. You will have to trash some and save others. This will be, most likely, tedious but better than losing everything like me!
8. You can do all that later, it will take time. For now, you are good. We have more to do.
9. Be sure you change ALL of your passwords. Do not make them all the same. Sorry, it's for your own good. Change characters, change numbers, change cases... make them different! In my case, they had logged onto my Facebook so I knew they had more information.
1. Make it a little complicated to be safe. Like your password could be HacKersSucK'2011 or hackersSUCK_2011 or hackerSuck/2011 or hacker$$uck'1969 ... lots of options to use random characters. Get creative but jot it down in a safe, non-web, place.
10. Now, here is where they really get nasty. Remember in number 5 when I said not to use your contact book yet? Yeah, well there was a good reason. I didn't notice this until 7 or 8 hours into the clean up of my mess. Those jerks messed up my contact list! They used a program to add the tiny word "in" after every email address... all 500 of them! Had I not used the "copy from the BCC" method, I would have sent a bunch of emails and gotten them all bounced back. This is why my instructions to you are important and purposeful.
1. Gmail has a nice feature where you can restore you contacts to a previous point. I restored mine to the night before the hacking and voila! All fixed. Easy enough but not top priority when you get hacked.
2. P.S. What I mean by the word "in" appended to your emails, all my contacts looked like this: SuzyQin@blankmail.com when her real email would have been SuzyQ@blankmail.com. Devilish suckers, huh?

I hope this hard earned education of mine is helpful to people out there. Please, leave me a comment and tell me if this information helped you out of a hacking situation. I just think these people are the lowest of the low. Fine, email our friends, they aren't stupid enough to think we went on a surprise vacation to Madrid but to systematically destroy our electronic storage? Unconscionable. So inhumane and truly shows people with a lack of morals and care for anyone but themselves.If you haven't yet, and would like to read the story of my experience (and not just my tips and lessons) please read my blog here: HackerPocalypse 2011 - The Story

Interesting September 11 Blog Statisics...

I checked my stats from my two Sept 11 blog posts and I saw a familiar image.Thanks for the reminders that I am headed in the right direction, HaShem...

HackerPocalypse 2011 - The Story

Here is the first part of a two-part story. This is the story of HackerPocalypse 2011.I am a savvy online person. I can spot scams a mile away. I debunk chain letters and forwards. This scam was so insidious that I was caught in its web. If I was caught, you could be too. This first part is the story of what happened, the next blog will be about how to prevent it and what to do when it happens to you. As my cousin said, "There are two kinds of people in this world. Those that have been hacked and those that will be."It was 5:30 in the morning on a Thursday. I was coming off a rough week. We had three events that week. The lead up was harsh. 60-70 hour work weeks. Coming home only to sleep, change and go back to work. I was busting tush. We got to unwind after the last event on Wednesday with a few adult beverages and afterwards I headed home. I was beat. So extremely exhausted. I finally went to bed around 10:30. I fell into bed totally wiped out.At 5:30 in the morning I started getting texts. One eye open, I noticed the name and decided I would go back to sleep. Why the heck would he be texting me at 5:30 in the morning? Whatever, check it later. I had tossed and turned all night... my brain never fully shutting off. I just wanted my last 2 hours of sleep... I wasn't to get them.Next was a text from my brother on the east coast. Weird. He rarely texts and never this early. What is going on? With one eye open I see the words "email" and "robbed." I close my eyes. "Was Ronin robbed? Did I get an email? Is my little brother okay?" I am starting to realize I won't be able to go back asleep when the next two texts come in. Both from a local friend. I put together that the first two texts were friends on the east coast but this was close to home. Why was Eric texting me at 5:45 in the morning? Seriously, dude... I'm sleeping.I open both eyes to read this one... "Your personal email has been hacked - change your password ASAP!"I sit bolt upright. WHAT?I try to access my email on my phone. Last email received: 2:17 a.m.It is now 6:07 a.m. and I can't access them. In just about 4 hours, they locked me out of my email.I am half awake, dizzy with the vertigo I try to avoid by not sitting bolt upright from a prone position, made worse by my confusion and exhaustion. I try accessing everything from my, what now looks like an extraordinarily tiny, iPhone screen.Dude. Seriously? I stumble to my living room put my computer on the floor and stretch out. Lights are still off in an attempt to fix the problem and still catch some zzzzzzz's...  5 or 10 minutes later these exact words cross my mind, "Not Likely."This is going to be harder than I expected. I can't access any of my gmail accounts. Eric sends me the text of the message to my work account. This is the first time I see what all 500 of my contacts (friends, family, work acquaintances, strangers who emailed me once, businesses) saw...

HiMy regrets for this sudden request, I have been involved in a robberyduring my trip to Madrid, Spain. I got mugged and all my belongingscash, mobile phone and credit cards were all stolen at gun point.  Ineed your help as am trying to raise some money.I've made contact with my bank but they are not providing a fastsolution. I need you to lend me some money to sort my self out of thispredicament, will pay back once I get this over with.Please let me know if you can assist me in anyway so i can forward youdetails to effect a transfer. You can reach me via email or thehotel's desk phone +3493106____.ThanksTalia--Talia H DavisMarketing Manager*Allied Jewish Federation of Colorado"In the midst of difficulty, lies opportunity." --Albert Einstein"All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed." --Sean O'Casey

That is it in its entirety (with some of the phone number removed so no one contacts them). Did you find this blog because you searched this information? Good. Keep reading and read my second blog about what to do when this happens to you. I found out some tricky information.Well, I imagine it was shocking to the 300 people I saw the day before at a huge event that I had, evidently hopped on a plane, gone to Madrid, gotten mugged at gun point, and emailed them. Shocking how fast the world moves.Now that I have given up sleeping, I have settled in for the long haul. I am in my recliner taking the right steps (again a plug for part two, how to fix this once it happens). I find out that they may be jerks but they are smart and fast. They covered their bases. As I am requesting access to my account (because at this point, I had absolutely none and no obvious way to regain access other than Google intervention) I am Googling the scam. I find records that (duh) this has happened many times before. I let those who have been there, guide me. I learn tips and tricks but I also learn something horrifying... in many of these testimonials the hackers deleted all of their email.WHAT?! Dude, hack my email account my don't destroy my electronic life! Now I am nervous. Will that happen to me or not? Will my emails from my brother who has passed away be safe? The business records I keep in my email? The institutional history I have for various organizations... the horrid memories I, for some sadistic reason, saved in my email.... will they all be gone?I raised this concern to one friend. He laughed it off... this was serious to me. By then it was time for most normal people to get up and the phone was ringing and my Facebook was blowing up. Another dear friend, Mel, who is also a writer, got on with me. When I told her I knew and what I feared awaited me when I had access again, she understood. You see we are both collectors of words. That was a 10 year collection and I feared it was gone.I began changing every password to something different and obscure, praying I could remember all of them. They had access to my bank info, Facebook, etc. In fact, Mel said they had been on my Facebook chat at one point. Everything got changed. Down to my password for this blog. I wasn't going to let these people have anything more than they have taken already.I was granted access to my account again around 8 am. I was scared to see what I would find.Inbox: EmptyFamily folder: EmptyMoney folder: EmptySent folder: EmptyIt was the same in every folder. I had a lot of them.... and a lot of emails. One person online had said their emails were in the trash folder. I checked it. Over 11,000 emails in the trash. WHEW! They hadn't made them disappear forever.First step, passwords all changed.Second step, settings checked.... what's this? They had changed my email to forward every single incoming email to an account they set up - taliah.davis@ymail.com (clearly they didn't know me). I cleaned that up right away. Hackers, you are SHUT DOWN!Third step, I emailed everyone to tell them this:

Well friends and family and acquaintances who I happened to email at any point in my life...You might have received an email from me very early this morning telling you I was in Madrid and needed money. I amA. not in MadridB. not been robbed at gun pointandC. while we are all always in need of money... don't need you to do anything.My email was hacked. Every email that I ever had dumped into the trash for me to try to recover. Please ignore that email and NEVER, NEVER put your password into any website or anything. I can't figure out when or where or how this happened to me but it is becoming all too common.Call this an opportunity for us to catch up. Very sorry for any inconvenience.Best,Talia

It turned out to be a great vehicle for catching up with old friends. Once that as out, I started the process of trying to recover my email.I went to the trash and was saving hundreds of current emails at a time. Then I thought, well the older ones are the more precious so do that first. I got some saved from November to March of this year (the time I was finishing up in Israel and then moving back to Colorado) when, while chatting with Mel online and on the phone with my mothers...BLINKThe trash permanently deleted.I hyperventilated This can't be happening.Gone. All gone.My mother is screaming a million miles away... "Talia! Talia! Talk to me! What happened??"I'm crying hysterically. I tell her that my emails deleted themselves. They must have left a program to do something or were still in the account and saw what I was doing.I used the Gmail feature to force anyone logged in out of the account and cried. My moms tried to console me. I needed to hang up. Several friends were chatting with me and asking what was going on through Facebook or GChat or text message. Most people said, "That sucks."Mel got it.We mourned together for those lost words, sent into cyberspace by the evil hackers.I called my father. He was meeting with another rabbi in Denver that day, unbeknownst to me. He calmed me down. He reminded me that I had the memories of the things I lost but also that it was literally, that day, the start of a new month, Elul. Elul is the last month before Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. It's a time for refreshing and renewing and letting go of the past.These hackers, whom I am tempted to call many nasty names, gave me freedom from the electronic chains that held me to some of my past.Once I did all I could do online, I closed my laptop and crawled back into bed. It was almost 10am. Four and a half hours after this ordeal began with a text message. I took a 20 minute nap and got up feeling refreshed. I dressed and met my father for a rare treat, a lunch together.We talked and he counciled me. Go to your specialists, right? My father is a specialist in sitting in council.My mothers, on the other hand, they called every computer person they ever met or heard of trying to fix this for me.Mel mourned the words with me.Eric told me to get a dirty chai (even though I felt nauseous) and face the day.My brother played it cool and quiet, in his perfect way. Offering support when I needed it but hanging back so as not to overwhelm me.And my dear friend Amanda, who saw me later in the day, hugged me, laughed with me, and reminded me that life goes on.The silver lining of the experience was the number of people who said they would have totally believed it if I ran off and had gone to Israel but Madrid? No way. Another friend said he knew it wasn't true because I would have kicked the mugger's butt first. HA! What great friends!It's been over a week since this happened. I've found that I am missing things that I will never recover but mostly, I am not missing much. I feel lighter. I feel refreshed. I still feel angry but I have moved forward.I know people might be reading this thinking, what a self-indulgent woman. What a waste of a blog or how melodramatic... For me, this was the death of something very important. What I lost in those 4 hours can never be recovered. The words of a brother who died, of friends who have died, memories, scraps of thought to write about forever gone into the dark hole of my brain... gone, never to be seen again.But I hope people can learn from this experience. So HackerPocalypse 2011 - The Lesson (aka part 2) will focus on that. Stay tuned.

Did We Do More Harm Than Good?

As we wrap up the marathon 24 hours of news coverage surrounding the tenth anniversary of September 11th, a question occurred to me.All day I have been watching on and off. DVRing some programs, watching others live. I went to the Colorado Rockies game today and it was full of symbolism and significance. Former military, current military, children, police officers, and firemen. Every conversation surrounded this significant day.As I wrapped up my day watching home videos and other citizen journalism, painstakingly chronically every second of the 102 minutes that changed our country, I found myself crying off and on... yelling at the dispatchers on tv who were telling people to "stay put" in the towers... cheering for the people running from the dust cloud.I finally peeled myself away from the tv to take a shower.In the shower I had a thought... have we done more harm than good? No, stop, don't jump to conclusions. Let me get this thought out.Today we packed every television station with wall to wall coverage of the tragedy ten years ago. Most stations replayed the reel from the day, ten years ago. The minute by minute discoveries. Was this an accident? Was it an explosion? Was it a small plane or a large one? Did a second plane just hit the other tower? Unconfirmed reports from DC and Pennsylvania. Explosion at the Pentagon. Targeting the White House? Terrorists? Accidents? Air Traffic Control problems? Is this war? This spells a change for our airport security.It sometimes felt like they were fortune tellers... I see a man, his name starts with an 'O' and he has a beard... Obadiah? Osama! Yes, that's it.I watched the coverage and remembered almost every word. The way the anchors interrupted each other. The footage of New Yorkers stricken.But did we do more harm than good by packing this day too full with the past images? I do not disagree that these are vitals pieces of our American history. I do not disagree that they should be archived and brought out to be seen often. But what struck me was that here we are, in the Hebrew month of Elul. A time to look back on our past, take stock of our present, and make adjustments for our future.We took time to look back. We have spent 24 hours looking at every angle of this tragedy... but what we haven't done is look at where we are today and what our future holds. Now I know Katie Couric is not a fortune teller and news anchors, no matter how hard they try, they cannot tell us the future... none of us can. But we sure can give ourselves a mantra for the upcoming year, a focal point, an ideal to live up to.One of the boat captains, who saved many lives (by the way, this was the largest water evacuation ever... larger than Dunkirk which was some 300,000 military men over the course of nine days... our tug boats and ferry men got over 500,000 New Yorkers out of Manhattan in less than nine hours), said "I have one theory in life. I never want to say 'I should have.'"This is what today should have been. Divided into three parts.

1. The memorial of the events, the reMEMBERING (once again affirming our membership into this most difficult 'club') of those lost and the horror of the day.
2. Taking stock of where we are today and noting our growth and the areas where we, as Americans, can still grow.
3. Looking forward to the future, deciding who we want to be and how we want to live.

This is the Eluling process. It's a healing process, one that helps us all move forward and take our memories and lessons with us.I fear we lost an opportunity here, a time when so many eyes were trained on the television screens that could help convey this process.

1. I remember those lost. I will never forget. The memory is seared into me. I wish all Americans still loved and helped each other like they did that day and for weeks after.
2. The events of 9/11 shaped me today. I do not fear death nor destruction because I know when my day will come it will come, thus I must live every day to the fullest. I learned to care for all and not just the people in my circle.
3. I never want to say 'I should have.' I want to do my best in this next year to care for all those around me.

10 Years Later.

10 years. I can't believe it has been 10 years. It alternately shocks me and makes me feel old.

You don't realize how old you are until you get the reminders, the landmarks, the moments for which we measure our life.

Two years ago, on the eighth anniversary of 9/11, I wrote my story of the events that happened that day. My experiences. Oh my experiences in Jacksonville, Florida pale in comparison to my friends who were in NYC or the families who lost loved ones but it is my experience. A snapshot of what people across the country experienced. I won't recap it here but if you would like to read it, you are welcome to - 9/11 – 911 – Sept 11 – 11 Sept.

Today I am reflecting on the time that has passed, how the world has changed in the past 10 years. I am fortunate to be old enough to remember what travel was like before the terror attacks. I remember coming home from my trip to Israel in 1997 and being met by my mother, father, step-mother, brother, and grandmother at the gate. Standing there waiting for me to get off the plane. I ran into their arms, I was comforted by their presence. I remember how that all changed on September 12, 2001. I remember the terror in my friends' voices when they had to travel home that Thanksgiving, taking a plane for the first time since the attacks.

I really remember how we, as Americans came together in the days, weeks, months after the attacks. When people started caring about each other. When selfish Americans because caring and careFULL Americans. When we stopped thinking about money and success and grades and getting from point A to point B but ensured each other was safe, healthy, and cared for. Slowly that ebbed. Slowly, America came back to our middle point, our place where the Starbucks across the street is too far for me to travel, I need one right here. Or my sandwich isn't made right or you didn't answer the phone the way I like or your clothing isn't to my standards or I dislike you for no reason other than you are you and not me.We were still unique but we thought somewhat collectively. We all prayed for the safety of each other.

Today we face a different type of hardship. No one flew an airplane into an iconic building (baruch HaShem - thank G-d). The terrorist threat is minimal. We are vigilant and careful to protect our country. But financially and politically we are in a transitional space. A place where we have dueling priorities. Cut budgets, save money, but care for each other. We must recall that time when your first thought was to get your neighbor out of the burning building. We caring for each other trumped buying a new BMW.

I am thankful to have been alive and old enough to remember the lessons from 9/11. It was a scary and terrifying day... and weeks and months... But I learned so much that day. I learned how important the stranger, widow, orphan, and neighbor in our midst is. I learned that success isn't measured by the money I bring in or the car I drive or the clothes I wear... it's measured in the people I help, the goodwill I share with others, the gift of time I give to those who need it...

Deeper than reaching into your pocket is reaching into your heart.

This is the Kaddish, the mourner's prayer. The prayer we say everyday for one year after losing someone and then yearly on their anniversary of their death. Notice there is very little mention about death in this prayer. The Mourner's Kaddish is not for G-d but for us... a reminder of people and time long gone.

We glorify and sanctify G-d's great name throughout the world which G-d has created according to G-d's will. May G-d establish G-d's kingdom in our lifetime and during our days, and within the life of the entire House of Israel, speedily and soon; Amen.

May G-d's great name be blessed forever and to all eternity.

Blessed and praised, glorified and exalted, extolled and honored, adored and lauded be the name of the Holy One, beyond all the blessings and hymns, praises and consolations that are ever spoken in the world; Amen.

May there be abundant peace from heaven, and life, for us and for all Israel; Amen.

G-d who creates peace in G-d's celestial heights, may G-d create peace for us and for all Israel; Amen.

Is New Media Mainstream?

This was written for an online publication and never published so I thought I would share it with my wonderful blog readers! Enjoy... I hope!Is New Media Mainstream?By Talia DavisThey say you know technology isn’t ‘cool’ anymore when your parents join. I have to admit, it was interesting to become ‘friends’ with my dad on Facebook but, overall, I feel that theory is incorrect. Facebook and Twitter may not be ‘edgy’ any more or reserved for us early adopters but I think the world at large is better for it. Twitter and Facebook have become mediums to share information and perhaps a message. Whereas they began as places to just connect to your friends, they are now places to find like-minded people and learn.Take the Tech Rav for example. Rabbi Tzvi Pittinsky is pioneering new, Kosher ways to use technology. He sends out regular messages that are designed to help the Jewish tweeter Jew. Every Friday, before shabbis, he sends out a message like this one –That is a nice break from the spam and less helpful conversations on Twitter. But it doesn’t end there. Forgot about Counting the Omer? Don’t worry, Tech Rav thought of that too…But I have to say his personalized Shabbis times is what impresses me the most. Just tweet @ShabbosStarts with your zip code and you get a response of the correct time that Shabbis starts in your area.Rabbi Pittinsky knows his audience and has provided some great tools for the Jewish Tweeter.One of the most ambitious social Jewish projects took place last year in the days leading up to Passover with the Tweet the Exodus event. As they put it “Relive the Exodus from Egypt, one tweet at a time.” Over the course of thirteen days, Twitter was the medium of a fascinating exchange.  The Pharaoh, Moshe, The G-d of Israel, even the Red Sea had its own twitter account. Other than breaks on Shabbat, it was an ongoing event filled with humor and education.The internet has made our world smaller and smaller. But it gives us the opportunity to connect with other Jews on levels that were never possible before. Jewish Tweet of the day? We have that - @JewishTweets. Want to send a message to the Kotel? No problem! @TheKotel. Need some advice? Rabbis of every flavor abound! @ReBahir, @RabbiRami, @RabbiShmuley, @RabbiJason, @ImaBima, @RecoveryRabbi. Take your pick of organizations and information... @JFederations, @JNFUSA, @TheJewishMuseum, @JTAnews, @Lubavitch.So yes, my dad is on Facebook (but my mom swears she will never be) and Twitter (though he still needs a little coaching) but I am thrilled at how mainstream these tools are. I can get a basketball score, local news, and an Omer reminder all in one place. That’s the beauty of the internet and I am so glad that we, as Jews, are fully embracing it.

Eluling... How To Start Fresh Every Year

The beginning of this secular month coincided with the beginning of the new Jewish month. Now that doesn't always happen and isn't very common but causes a bit of confusion among the secular community when it does.  But that is neither here nor there. This new month is called Elul.People talk about Elul being the last month of the year, before Rosh Hashanah comes in to begin our new year. However, that is not quite correct either. Here's a funny trick about the Hebrew year. Our big new year's celebration (think more apples and honey than party hats and champagne), when the year changes... actually falls in month #7 in our year. Yes, you read that right. Tishrei is month #7 and yet our year will flip from 5771 to 5772 at that time. I know, odd but true. In fact Jews have several new years. But again... that is neither here nor there nor what this blog is about.Today I am talking about what we do in Elul. Elul is that chug chug chug up to the top of the roller coaster. Elul is the getting out all the ingredients before you bake a cake. Elul, in some traditions, is the dating period between us and G-d. We are preparing, we are learning about ourselves, and we are looking back at our past and towards our future.Elul is an amazing time of year. We have built in a whole month to process the year, to look at our own actions towards our self, our world, our neighbor, and G-d. We have the opportunity to see what worked last year and what didn't. Once we take that time to reflect, it is time to take action. I know you are asking yourself, "But Talia, what action can we take?" Oh my goodness, well I would be happy to share! I am happy to share but I will give you a warning... none of these are as easy as you think/wish they were...

1. Forgive yourself. You have to. Let it go. Make mistakes, learn from them, move forward.
2. Forgive your neighbor. Yes. Do it. In traditional Jewish liturgy says that G-d requires you to forgive every Jew. I say you must forgive every person. Why? Because holding onto the hate does not punish the other person... it only hurts you. It will eat you alive.
3. Forgive G-d. We all have had those moments. Time when we just are so angry at G-d that we can't believe in the concept anymore... or that we shake our fist at the sky and say "it's all your fault." There are times when I am so angry at G-d because he took my brothers away. It wasn't fair, it was too early, it was so mean and rude and just plain unfair. I want to get on the floor and throw a temper tantrum but when I am done... where am I? In the same place I was before with the same pain from before. We have to let it go. Again, it only will hurt you.

So that is what Elul is about. It isn't about (in my best British accent) repentance and other huge and old fashioned words... That's bimah talk. Elul is about forgiveness of self and others. It's about looking at your past year learning from the successes, failures, mediocrity (because we all have all three) then wiping the slate clean and starting fresh. Leaving the past year behind you.Below I have included a teaching from The Rebbe on repair. We talk a lot about repair year round but especially this time of year. Repairing the world, repairing our self, "repairing others" (though that is a bit misguided)... but what truly is repair? G-d has faith in us to repair the world that (S)He created. G-d has faith in us to repair ourselves that (S)He has created. Repair is not creation, repair is the vision to see the whole amidst the shattered pieces... truly I cannot do the concept better justice than the brilliant Rebbe...

On Repairbased on the letters of R' Menachem Mendel SchneersonTo create is to reveal the parts from the whole.To repair takes a greater wisdom. It is to discover the whole from the shattered parts.He creates a world, knowing it will be broken, so He may empower us with the wisdom to repair it.